FOOD IS MY ENEMY!!!

I tried a new recipe today for Sweet Soy Chicken and Peppers. It's an old recipe my grandmother stopped making because nobody liked it, but she tends to..."forget" what she's cooking and add in salt every couple of minutes because she just can't remember she already put salt in before. Anyway, it was delicious, absolutely fantastic. I'd eat the whole the pan of it if I could...that's why FOOD IS MY ENEMY!!! I can't resist good food, and while it doesn't show THAT much, I feel like it does sometimes.

Brad and I have been exchanging text messages all day--he makes me laugh and smile so much, and "gets a rise" with some of the things he says (wink wink). He makes me feel smart AND sexy, which is unusual for me--I'm used to feeling smart, and used to being sneered at for it, but he makes me feel like I'm intelligent and actually can do something with my life. As for the sexy, I've never felt so sexy in my life. He doesn't know it, but the way I dress...I'd never have put some of the clothes on that I do before I met him. I don't feel like I need to be ashamed of my body, even though I do have a few areas that could use a little bit of work.

I'm looking forward to chatting with him online tonight, and I still can't wait for Friday. I miss him a lot when I don't get to see him, but I think it makes our relationship stay fresh and new that we aren't CONSTANTLY together. When people are constantly together, every free minute they have, they use up love and affection that should be able to drag out for years and years. I see it in my parents, one set of my grandparents too. The other set...they have intertwined lives, but separation too. My granny owns a greenhouse that keeps her busy, my grandfather goes to work and has joined a Masonic lodge. They are more in love than I think my parents are, and I really think it lies in having individual freedoms. I don't even think my grandfather knows about the loan Granny gave me. They allow each other to be who they are, not pushing to be one person. To me, this is what I want. I never thought of a relationship as two becoming one, because no matter how alike you are, you need to be separate people, but respect the rules of a relationship--be honest, be open, share, but don't feel like you have to BE the other person to be WITH them.

So, see you soon, readers, I'm heading off for a bit to shower and get ready to talk to Brad when he gets off work. Mua! Hehe, I keep doing stuff like that, telling this journal I love it and kissing it...hahaha, I guess it's part of me, and I do love me (and I think Brad will be the only one who gets that joke).